ELECTIONS 01 Joe &. BRO

MATTHEW 10:29-3 June 25, 1972

Life keeps teaching me that a lot of people don't feel that they are worth muchy ,
I nave read that many times: I have learned acadewically that self-esteea is essential
to emotional health and joyful living. I have learned that strong people have a strong
sense of their own value as persons, and ¢ghat many of the people with major problems
are the ones whose entire lives area kind of test track on which their manhood, or
power, or worth must be proved daily.

but T continue to be amazed at the way life itself teaches me that in addition
to all the psychology and theology in the bocks I happen to read. Let me illustrate
by way of siy own recent experiences,

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Several weeks a90y 1 Spent six cays at the Institute for Advanced Pastoral Studies

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in Detroit. The event wes called a Worksop in Personal Grout, aia one of its objectives
was to provide the cpportunity for eaca participant to uo some rather intense thinking
and evaluating of cimself. One of the devises euployed was a trust group: four
individuals wio wet cogether each evening. As initial input for discussion eacn person
had to list on a large sueet of paper his strong points, capabilities, competencies, -

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what he could offer tie croup. ; the other side we were to list those areas of

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oursel¥es wierc we iced and where we wanted to de some growing. dust that

much wes a very interesting exercise, because it occured to me that most of us have
been conditioned not to reveal cither of these lists to anyone. I don't recall ever
naving to weite down and then describe to others my strong ooints and capabilities.
seedless to say, I'm not going to reveal the content of my list because you may want
to take exception. for am I about to reveal my list of weaknesses because I suspect
you may want to add a few itows 1 heve overlooked.

In any case the three other members of my strust group and I experianced a lot
of discoufort in telling each other about what was good and strong in ourselves, more
discomfort, interestingly, tian we experienced in the process of talking about cur

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weaknesses. This was particularly evident in the case of one man ~- whose pos
list was sparse - but whe was able to fill up a whole sheet and then some with negative

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comments about himself. he was a professor of religion at a smal] Southern colleg

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quite conservative thealogicatly, about fifty years of age, partially paralyzed, and
had an extremely difficult tte moving ateut - althouun ne hed taught himself to do
everything he needed to ao, He was quiet, withdrawn, aid he quickly Tet us know that
14*e was in the process of Falling apart for hin. His wife of twenty Five years had
moved out and his three yound sons hac rejected hin and moved out with tieir motser.
This situation, in turn, he was sure, would result in his being fired by the colleae,

Little by little we dot to know him and to see how he was destroying hiuself as
aman, We vas surc, for instance, that the faiture in marriage and parenthood was
his alone, and ae kept askin: us to tell Ain how to do better. We discovered jen.
cembemery tiat iis physical proble: had caused him te assume over the years that 4e was
unattractive te others: that he Hen't even Tike to shake hands with other men: that
he had never physically odbrace! fis sons, ani that he found paysical contact with
anyone, includ ing pds wits very threatening - bacarse - he assured -others vere
repelled Ly hin.

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Whenw got deeply ant toucsed on theology he Tet us knoy mee that he
regarded his affliction and his current life situation as the working of God's wll:
that God wanted hiu te keer trying harder to overcore the obstacles which His will had
constructed. At Jone last te was able to say what was really at the aeert of the
problem: ne really didn'+ wane te fight ammaore - in fact, he didn't want to live
anymore, because in atl the wort nabody seenel to care whether he lived or ¢fed.

I dott know whet he's deing now, but I lo know that after six cys we vere able
to communicate that he mattered to us: ani we vere able to get him to fil? aut Sis
list of strcag points - and tuat he was alle go laugh a littla bit, and to ist us
hold doors for bie - ant that by the lust Uday he was snaking qands with and touchins
everybody he could. And ‘a like to think he knew that he mattered ~ which is recily
the essence of th: Gospel ef Jesus Christ,

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vn the fourth aay of tre conference, after tais intensive kind of deeessien, we

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were taken to downtows detroit anc teld te try to make contact with city peente in a
way that communicated that they mattered. ‘ow. nothing could be Tess annaeling te
mo tnan that agenda. emi) I have been taught and conditioned not to talk to strangers,

ani nothing is more foreign to my porsonal style than striking un a conversation on a

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Street corner. In fact, I think all ef us regard strangers as somewhat of a threat:
if chance places ®$ beside one on an airplane we pretend as if he isn't there as
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long as we can: if we are forcéd to talk we amm the rituals of superficialty
without revealing anything about ourselves. sonetines experience teaches us that it's
eafsier that way. Pa bre way to Detroit I happened to sit beside a couple wao had
been celebrating the 500 for 48 hours or so, and who after orcering and cueffing two
martinis turned and asked me what I did and where T was going. When I told them a
great pall cescendad over the conversation which Seon came to a halt. In any case,
I don't talk to strangers much and I avoided doing 1t almost all day in Detroit. Sut
finally I forced nuself te approach a guard at the Art Museum: hews friendly but
obviously a little suspicious about why I should befalking with him. After a painful
couple of inutes I managed te turn the conversation to him - his family, how he liked
being a guard: and discovered that he wes an interesting person: a college drop-out
WnO WaS port of the educated unemployed, whe found an interest in African Art and
hoped one day to become an atterney. We talked for 26 minutes or so: before we vere
done we had shown each other pictures of our fa: ‘ies: anc when I left he thanked me.
He said en-one ~ in all his sinieg as a guard - had over seemed interested in him as a
person,

Une more experience from Uetreit: every night a group of ten of us went out for

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a sandwich ~ to seme restaurant. The wattreas was guite cold and unfriendly and
totally unresponsive to our altemptsto joke and make swal] talk. After two nights,
@ asked her name and why she was so unresnensive. She revealed that her husband
had just had a massive heart attack anc was in the hospital and she just didn't feel
very happy about agthing. we expressed our concern, and the next nignt inquires
about fis conui tiong. By &: wig Time the week was over she was waiting for us to arrive
and anxious to share the news of the day from the hospital. When we told hereon
Friday that we wouldn't be in anymore ~ she Seened concerned and walked away returning
: vas ; her

a few minutes later with a cake for us ~ and tears in GR eyes. Somehow we nad
communicated that she mattered - and that fact 2lone meant more to her than any of

us dmagined.

Life is full of that ~ anc those kinds of people. Just lagt week I received an

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counted . So have no Fear: you are worth nore than ay number of sparrows.” St,10:29-3]

The, To think is the cospel for our time, That ig wi ‘Yow say a child's nage as

att he ts Amber “hn wo, bed always and ubbaatelea te Gedy That is wy

we 98 baptized - te 4 int te it is so very essential for people who belang to the
churca to learn to know each other and te bo abt= ta share wit each atherg, Because
we are Called y to yive the geod rows of desus Christ te each other - by a& firing
our individual worth and value: ty loving zach other in a way thet says you satter to
Someone - to God, aie! bxcause of that, to ne,

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mee Tessons of toealogy are learned fa life ~ as T have tried to relate

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to you this ocrning. fo. the orsetest trug’; of the Gospel is expertence? in life - when

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Ou ane f sense Liat emetter tn Tod's eyes: that we count, we have werikh and value,
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Hay you cxyertosce thet Soot “ees that salvetioustPis Wornine. ney

Father ys are cretefeT foo oorselvcs: for eT ye Dave pede as, the potential atid

way fou heyve buidt inte us. “ela us to sonse aur oun wortiifelness. Ane tedp

us LO affine the worth of each ather, Through Jesus fhrisk sur Lerd, ARE

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APPERBATION CF PAL ers