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GOD THE, MENDER
( Genésis 33:1-11
Matthew 5:21-24
September 30, 1973

At least once a week a particular ritual happens as I arrive home_in the evening
for ainner.\ one of the children is waiting and as I come through the_door I am handed
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a broken toy, or told a tale of woe about the bike or wagon or ai rplane that has become
a casualty of old age @aimmmingmye or rough hand1 ing. \ Sometimes there are tears @ some-
times there is guilt - but always there is hope and total trust, that whatever the problem
is Daddy will fix it.\ Sometimes I can \ And when I can I experience a rather rare and
special feeling of sa isfaction. \ Petty parental ego, perhaps:\more so for_me because I am
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not exactly a master mechani c.\ And yet oned the great_privi leges and joys of parenthood

is to be a Mender - a fixer - a healer - one who restores that which is broken - who
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makes whole that which has come apart.
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You've done that:\our stories would vary only in detail and the relative degree of

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expertise we bring to the task.\ 1 mention it because the God we worship is in the mending -

healing - fixing business | Instead of toys he deals in human Lives.\ Instead of _bikes
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and trucks and planes he works with human relationships. | When we feel like we are coming
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apart at the seams he has the power_to put us back together again.\ When, like Humpty
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Dumpty, our lives are au and all the kings s horses and all the kings men can't help, God

can-\ When we experience fracturing and breaking in our relationshipywith those we love,

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That's the point of one of the oldest stories in the Bible:| the saga_of Issac_and

his sons Jacob and ge usually remember is that Jacob disquised himself as

; slew
Esau by putting some lawb=cewael on his arms and neck and succeeded in beating his

brother out of their father's blessing. \ Or we remem! something about Jacob's Ladder,

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or that he wrestled all night with an angel and came out crippled. \ All of which is
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unfortunate because the story is a beautiful one and it concludes in a rather surprising
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manner. | It happens between the_27th and the 34th Chapters of the book of Genesis and it

has enough intrigue and human interest to make good reading.

In case you haven't been working with that part of the Bible recently let me review

the story quickly.

GOD THE MENDER -2-

Issac was old and blind and he sent his eldest and favorite son, Esau, to hunt some
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game and prepare a meal with the promise that he would bless him when he returned.

Jacob, the younger of the two, and his mother Rebekah's favorite, conspired with his mother

to receive the highly valued blessing\ Together they worked on the disguise and prepared
the food and succeeded in deceiving the old man. TSGOE “Sane: he leet “Rate seeak weer

Now Issac and Esay were a little upset when they discovered what had happened and so

his mother arranged for Jacob_to escap@to her brother Eeess Jon the way Jacob had his
famous dream about the ladder and the angels descending and ascending and God‘ promise

that_he would be the father of a great nation.\ Jacob fell in love with tatian's daughter
Rachel and agreed to work for seven years in order to earn the right _to be hep husband.
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But after seven gears dale offered another daughter - Leah \so Jacob worked another
seven years before Rachel became his wife.
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At about that time Jacob, always crafty, did some fancy maneuvering with Fekier’s stock
and endéd up owning more than his father-in-law. \iuien Rachel and Leah, a lot of children,

and his new flocks he ¢@iemme&f again. he famity. | As he feared home

he sent messengers ahead ® tell Esau he was coming - with great anxiety, we might assume.
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On the night ltefore his arrival, Jacob slept alone, across the stream called Jabbock { And ha?

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during the night was visited by a man with whom he wrestled.\ The man blessed Jacob and
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toldhim his new name wald be Israel and Jacob emerged from the experience with a lame hip.

The next morning Esau approached with 400 men in tov.\ Jacob couldn't have known
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what to expect. \ He went out in front of his entourage - and bowed Tow as he walked to

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meet his brother. | And Esau - Esau_came running down off the_hill, embraced his brother,

kissed him and extended the love and forgiveness tat Jacob wanted so badly. The dam of

resentment and hatred and jealousy buyst and a relationship fractured years b efore was
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given a new beginning. | Faso oer s enibeaced-end meet tegerher
The point of the story is that when Jacob deceived his father, cheated his brother

and stole from his father-in-law, he broke his own relationship with God. Jacob was still

an elected man, select-ed by God to be the father of his people. \ But there was some
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putting together that had to be done fi rst.\ And Jacob's escapades over the period of more t

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than fourteen years are the context in which God does his work o f mending and healing.

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GOD THE MENDER hem - lows Gok wl hee een Ayia mg Wis Corcnicus -

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The dream - the experiance at the Jabbock - are expressions of God working in his
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life to heal those precious relationships he had so casually severed.| God, the story
For while Jacob humped himself by bowing

seems to be sayine.

before his brother, Esau forgot about the fact that he was about to square an old account

and took the initiative by running alone down the pint. \ age God's will - God's love -
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God's power ~ may be seen in the story in what I consiger one of the most beautiful

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verses in the Bible... "But Esau ran to meet set him, and embraced him, and Falt_o on his neck

and kissed him, and they wept. "y And the climax to the whole saga comes several years
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later: [rand Issac brethed his tat; and he died and was ssthere? to his people, old and full
of days; ad his sons Esau and Jaceb buried him. in." ]
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One of the underlying principles of Old Testament religion is that when you break

with man you break with 60d, \ r early Israelite history, God's declared purpose is to

create a nation out of some wandering desert tribes 2 nation that would be his special
people among all the peoples of te earth. \ Thus, a great deal of attention is paid in

the Qid Testament to relationships with members & one's family and with one's neighbors.

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A man's standing with God depends, directly on his membe ership in the family and ocmmunity.

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If he broke that, he severed his relationship with God.

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Sadly, the Old id Testament, is the story of the Jews forgetting that time and time

again.\ As As the faith of Israe] became the rel iqion of dudaism;\as the wandering tribes

became a nation, human relationships became less important. Proper obergvance of ritual
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replaced prop@r treatment of the neighbor | Obedience to the jaw supplanted the sense

of oneness with the community.) A way of relating - in which one's sense of salvation

was all wrapped up in relationship with other people became a religion with major emphasis
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on personal righteousness. \Thethrust shifted from compynity to individual \ fron integrity

and caring and forgiving in relationships - to proper observance of ceremony and strict

adhearance to te rules.

In Jesus' day the Pharisees were the epitome of this shift in enphasis. | Totally

devoted to ritual, purity and legal obedience they excluded - excommunicated=the majority

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of their countrymen from the faith. \ Instead of the healing force in the common life of

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the people, religion became the wedge that divided \ Jesus enfuriated them by befrtending
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GOD THE MENDER -4-

THOSE THE Pharisees considered outcast. \ He challenged the basic suppositions of their
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religion every time he associated with someone they considered unclean - or a sinner.
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Jesus was a nender\ He - not they - understood the religion of Israet.\ This is how

he put it: \"You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall not ki). \But I sy to you that every
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one who is angry with his brother shall be liable to judgenent. .."| And then, in case they
didn't get the point: \'If you are offering your gift at the altar, and then remember that
your brother has something against you, leave your gift then before the altar and go:
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first be reconciled to your brother, and then come and offer your gift."

That is to say, Jesus was reaffirming the old understanding that a break with man is

a break with God \\ And in a dramatic image, put ga higher priority on getting your

relationships right than performing the most sacred act of Judaism - placing a gift

om the altar { sesus saw the destructiveness of unresolved anger and resent. and the
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hypocricy of affirming love for God while arrogantly shutting out other people.
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Frederick Beuchner in Wishful Thinking, has this to say about anger:

‘Cf the Seven Deadly Sins, anger is possible the most fun.\ To lick

your wounds, to smakk. your lips over grievances long past. to roll
your tongue over the prospect of bitter confrontations still to come,
to savor to the last toothsome morsel both the pain you_ are given
and the pain you are giving back - in many ways it is a feast fit
for a king.\ The chief drawback is that what you are wedtully wolFiag
down is yourself.\ The skeleton at the feast is you." (P.2)
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Now we've taken the long route through the Biblical text this morning because, I

think, it speaks for itself. rt becomes the Word of God as you apply it to those.particular

relationships of yours that need some mending. \ It becomes the power of God as you sense
that He is the one agitating your conscience or provoking your guilt over ‘relationships
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that are less than satisfadory. \ and there is no one here, I would suggest, who doesn't
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have some.

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We are more aware today, in a healthy way, of our relationships. | Every book counter is
full of titles advising how to raise children \ how to get along with teena ers \ how to_get
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more out of your marriage \ Consider the preponderance o fami ly and marriage situations
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on television. All the way from Dick Van Dyke to the Archie Bunkers. | We are learning

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that human relationships are fragi | 6} and—tapontont and denanding \ And part of what

is happening is that we are becomeing aware that many of our relationships could be a lot
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A marriage counselor tells the account of one group meeting_in which the particypants

were t t pict t of magazi i i
re to cut pictures out of magazines and put together a collage that described their
narriage\ One woman "cut out the most gorgeous pictures she could find - lavish holiday

dinners with candeles and colorful tables - a young couple, laughing and running barefoot
on the beach - a station wagon full of children with baseball gloves and toothy grins -

front and center was a bouquet of brilliant red roses. |\She pasted all these pictures into
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a solid collage of beauty - a dream world of idyllic relationships.\ But then came the
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moment of truth. \ She took a large black crayon and smeared the whole collection -

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In terms of family relationship§ Margaret Mead has obseeved that this is prot ably
the most miserable, unhappiest generation of parents in human hi story.\ Listen to adolescents

disillusionment, discouragement - frustrated hopes."

hips with parents \ Listen to parents

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and it's the same story in a different vocabulary. | pesu-sc obsessed wl Capt ae battle of
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talk and you'll hear about_ unsatisfactory relations

——p The God of Jacob was a power for reconciliation and forgiyeness between brothers. 1)
Jesus was a mender of basic human relationships. \ We can, I think, learn from him. woe
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He affirmed people, especially the broken. | His criticism was reserved for the sad

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arrogant. He took time for peoples he touched them physical ys\ he listened to them,
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he dentified with them, \he loved them. \ He told them that they mattered:\ that they were
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important to him and to God.\ And the result was that they began to appreciate themselves:

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if they were loveable to him - they must be alright.) And suddenly they were-able to ,
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love others in a new and honest WAY -wiee see gtlogen | wit Det : ava We base &
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_—sy But the most important thing he _taught, and in retrospect, the most important lesson

to be learned from the saga of Jacob and Esau, is that the key to healing. a broken rela-
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tionship is always held by the person who has been of fended.\\ Remorse, regret, apology -

will not get the job done. \It is possible to insult someone, feel badly about it later,
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go to that person and mologize and atbtagechangde . = relationship is still broken. \
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If someone hurts you and you draw back, shutting them out until they apologize - forgiveness
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isn't really going to happen when they get around to saying “I'm sorry".| I've _done

it myself, but there is probably nothing more meaningless than addressing a child: "Now
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you tell your brother you're sorry."{It makes us feel better because a ritual has been
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performed, but nothing resembling reconciliation has transpiried between siblings.
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In marriage, in families, in other relationship, we go at it backwards.\ Forgiveness
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can only be given by the one who has been huét.\ only Esau could cause a reconciliation

by running down the hill to embrace his brother. \\ And only your love -your grace - your

forgiveness can really mend the relationship broken by someone else.\ Try it Pick

someone who has offended you.\ Go to that person, and in whatever words you have, tell

them you've forgiven them:\ that you want the relationship to be whole again.
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Forgieness is not a matter of forgetting the wrong that was done and acting as if it
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never happened.\ Forgiveness means that the hurtful act will not be a barrier|[+this shall
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not separate us. | The bond of love is stronger than the separating power the would come

between us."\only the offenkd person can say that.

It can be risky business, of course. \ rt opens you eX loitation. \ There am wan be

people who don't want your forgieness.\ Jesus got crucified for his efforts\\ But love
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has a winsomeness aobut it that can overcome a lot of barriers.
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That's what the Gospel of Jesus Christ is all about:\forgieness that is extended

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before we ask: |love that takes the initiative and comes to usa God whose consistant
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graciousness accepts us as we are. \ God is a mender - a healer - a fixer of brokeness -

in our lives - and in our relationship$ som

Father, grant us the grace to be forgiving, even as you have forgiven us. And help us

to be menders in your work of reconciliation. Through Jesus Christ our Lord. AMEN

©, Are live as onc of en* people - is Ye shere this
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